Box Chocolate Review

Fleur de Cocoa

Info Details
Country USA   
Style Mainstream      
lo
med
hi
CQ
Sweetness
Intensity
Complexity
Impact
Fleur de Caca = dead flowers for the beheaded chocolate bunny. How many beans had to be sacrificed for this chococide?
Presentation   3.4 / 5
more effort went into naming the truffles & tying the bow on a glossy ballotin jewel-box than enrobing the hefty pieces within (big compared to tiny oh-so-excruciatingly-precious French-style bonbons, though still shy of working class slabs from See's that fill up a lunch bucket); finishes poorly executed; some appeared filed down to achieve an even bottom; others w/ bases weakly attached; a few unevenly tempered (splotches); gets worse from there. But any official present wrapper in the family can appreciate a well-tied bow. 3 points are for the bow.
Aromas   4.3 / 5
baleful (not a whiff of chocolate) explosion of starburst candy
Textures/Melt   6.6 / 10
Shells: generally thick
Centers: Jekyll & Hyde: milks are creamy & rich while darks trend dry & stiff
Flavor   28.8 / 50
atrocious equilibrium; flabby infusions on steroids over flat-liner dead chocolate whose tannins have been gutted
Quality   19.6 / 30
This was done on purpose? A generous interpretation would be good combinations 'overly-tailored' according to a Frenchman's conception of what Americans want, rather than what a presumed artisan can deliver.
Selections
Couverture: Barry Cacao (a vapid flaw where trying to enforce a French approach on-the-cheap becomes dogmatic)
Fleur de Vanille – just suck on a sugar cube
5th Avenue - goes for the candy bar rather than NYC's bling alley; an inside out play of semisweet Dark shell, pumped w/ cake frosting fill, made from pistachio cinnamon white choc
Julia Child - chocolate an innocent bystander w/ the warbling voice of its namesake; pink peppercorn just busts thru the armor ala some peppered shank from Julia's "wall oven w/ the squeaking door" & bleeding profusely from chopped off fingers in the SNL parody to annihilate a Dark-on-Milk ganache; among best texture of the collection though; still, the Culinary Goddess' estate should have their lawyers issue cease & desist order... completely off balance
Bisou - mos def of the set; true, cognac lays a slobbering smooch on chocolate but the couverture's metallic-tasting alkalis pair up oddly well to the warm heat of alcohol, especially in the deep shaft
Earl Grey - evidently they drink their tea very weak & with lots of milk... Java MC w/ hazelnut overtones rolls over a phantom earl
Cassis - tant pis; black currant egg whites
Soleil - dramatic sunburst on the shell; waxy, upmarket take on Orange Julius; splashion fruit & Cointreau extracted on White Choc for a citric disaster
Fleur de Cocoa - expecting redeeming characteristics from a signature piece??; thick dry cocoa-fudge mix barely 'sticks it', to use a gymnastics phrase for 'dismount'

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