Valtellina
by Agostoni
Impact
Valtellina -- the valley in Lombardy right in the crosshairs between Italy, Switzerland, & Germany where it situates a critical alpine pass negotiated & fought over for centuries -- from the 30 Years War to Mussolini seeking an escape refuge there at the tail end of WWII.
Today it attracts mostly skiers. And this bar... a homage to the Valtellina Disaster of the summer of 1987 when heavy precipitation & glacial melting flooded the area, destabilizing it & causing a high velocity avalanche & landslide. In the ensuing aftermath, towns & hamlets were obliterated.
Similarly, the forces in this White Chocolate squash its own cocoa butter content, leading taste-buds on with an imaginary bunny down the rabbit hole.
Today it attracts mostly skiers. And this bar... a homage to the Valtellina Disaster of the summer of 1987 when heavy precipitation & glacial melting flooded the area, destabilizing it & causing a high velocity avalanche & landslide. In the ensuing aftermath, towns & hamlets were obliterated.
Similarly, the forces in this White Chocolate squash its own cocoa butter content, leading taste-buds on with an imaginary bunny down the rabbit hole.
Appearance 2.9 / 5
| Color: | straw... |
| Surface: | ... flecked with vanilla-dots |
| Temper: | cholic |
| Snap: | barely a hiccup |
Aroma 6.7 / 10
baby formula smothered in lightly salted butter with a slight kick to it (as much cow's butter than cocoa butter) -> regurgitates Bitto cheese hand-burped in some stone huts around Lombardy known as calecc
Mouthfeel 12 / 15
| Texture: | soft & smooth as a baby's butt (if a little too slick too) |
| Melt: | fast for so much fat |
Flavor 39.3 / 50
cooked milk anticipates the infant's formula, heavy on the anhydrous butter (a clarified butter heated to remove moisture & then centrifuged to remove milk solids) -> cake frosting (honey sweetened / vanilla lined) -> just milks the salted protein (casein) -> talcum powder -> butter tab
Quality 14.6 / 20
Uncreative.
Standard FlavorProfile for the White Choc category. Thoroughly processed, then vanilla-ized, & precious little of the rich, clean milk from diary cows feeding on the high mountain meadows of the Valtellina.
Nothing ventured / nothing gained. Just serviceable product.
Reviewed May 22, 2012
Standard FlavorProfile for the White Choc category. Thoroughly processed, then vanilla-ized, & precious little of the rich, clean milk from diary cows feeding on the high mountain meadows of the Valtellina.
Nothing ventured / nothing gained. Just serviceable product.
Reviewed May 22, 2012