Barcelona
by Vosges
Impact
Vosges never disappoints; it operates on a level of marketing witchcraft having to do with mass psychology, familiar to anyone experienced in pub crawls. Crowds get on their knees only to end up lying on the floor in an anatomical crime, remembering even during the next day's hangover that what they spat up the night before can sometimes be tasty reflux - in this case called Barfelona.... every-day-of-the-week kind of chocolate.
Appearance 1.9 / 5
| Color: | whey-faced fatty |
| Surface: | this girl is staying home on prom night: pimples, blemishes, pock marks, scars - whew |
| Temper: | dull |
| Snap: | dud |
Aroma 4.7 / 10
generally recessive & aromatically challenged: used WD-40 machine oil, rancid almonds & peanuts, artificial liquid hickory smoke
Mouthfeel 10.8 / 15
| Texture: | grit 'n grind |
| Melt: | a little ensnared &, as expected, uneven distribution / pace, but well-timed sequence to the flavors |
Flavor 39.3 / 50
slides in grease -> goes to the blackboard (chalk) until smoked almonds get salty & come to the fore, squirreling their way thru bland & starved milk choc -> fat buttered almond ice-cream vat -> pulls out corked toffee
Quality 15.6 / 20
A battery of additives (including peanut oil) leaks out into a pool of decent flavor. The ingredients also list "DEEP milk chocolate" which in Vosges-code means 'thick fat' thanks to a separate variety of the that ("milk fat"). All adds up to a morass & an adulterated snack for non-stop nibblers who ego surf the web 24/7 in between rounds of salted nuts & beer.