Woolloomooloo
by Vosges
Impact
Another love package & presentation from “haute” Vosges, the “juicy couture” of the chocolate world. Alas, no balance / no marriage of flavors (not even a good argument); just a fatal mess of a douchebaguette.
Appearance 4.8 / 5
| Color: | quiet sienna |
| Surface: | beautiful imprinted release on the face, high gloss letters juxtaposed... |
| Temper: | ... with soft matte |
| Snap: | no noise &... |
Aroma 3.7 / 10
... no nose ‘cept cheap JC Penney shoe leather musk
Mouthfeel 10.9 / 15
| Texture: | granulated |
| Melt: | very fast; good dispersion similar to sorbital-sweetened chocolate |
Flavor 17.2 / 50
commercial milk w/ heavy salt -> highly processed & stepped on… then BAM -> salt + rancid nut oil... Rachel Ray get in on this – “YUM-O!”
Quality 5.8 / 20
Degraded, poor, & paltry; add inert too. The reason most confectioners avoid blending macadamias with milk is because the oils transmute & turn fast. This just tries to salt away the flaws. Garbage in / garbage out; when one produces trash, one views & uses the world in the same way – as trash - & only the cynically clever pass it off as high-minded product.
Let’s be blunt: how much oral sex are the Vosges ggrrrlllls blowing up to get the press they do? Seriously, either that or journalists nowadays are a pack of ignor-anuses who enjoy taking it up the rear & out the mouth. Obviously, we’ve yet to receive any such favors.
ING: cocoa mass, sugar, dry milk, milk fat, cocoa butter, soy lecithin, vanilla, macadamia, coconut, hemp seeds
Let’s be blunt: how much oral sex are the Vosges ggrrrlllls blowing up to get the press they do? Seriously, either that or journalists nowadays are a pack of ignor-anuses who enjoy taking it up the rear & out the mouth. Obviously, we’ve yet to receive any such favors.
ING: cocoa mass, sugar, dry milk, milk fat, cocoa butter, soy lecithin, vanilla, macadamia, coconut, hemp seeds