Chocavier 90%
by Venchi
Impact
Better brand caviar, from the Caspian Sea for example, has lower sodium. Any chocolatarian worth their salt knows cacáo is far superior to caviar (more ethical too; no need to rape out any ovaries). But, hey, nothing wrong with a little marketing gimmick as long as it's backed-up by performance.
Along the same lines that JFK nailed Washington DC as a mix of northern charm & southern efficiency, this has botox candor & Oreo luxury.
Along the same lines that JFK nailed Washington DC as a mix of northern charm & southern efficiency, this has botox candor & Oreo luxury.
Appearance 4.4 / 5
| Color: | ash brown |
| Surface: | very hard-boiled egg roe, coal, cinders, gravel, schlubs |
| Temper: | charred |
| Snap: | n/a |
Aroma 7.2 / 10
smells like bad sex: dry-roasted nib-like effects & bletted, sweaty citrus (sticky juice concentrate)
Mouthfeel 13.6 / 15
| Texture: | soft 'n tender |
| Melt: | special kinetics / magic act: fragments congeal into a breastaurant, then a meltaway masterpiece |
Flavor 35.4 / 50
broken cookie action - none of the bright fruit in the aroma materializes, suppressed by alkalis & butter: blackened cocoa powder + banana cream + vanilla compact into an OREO -> ash at the back; cake mix in the after length
Quality 14.2 / 20
Botox'd with butter & Dutched cocoa powder alters the course of underlying cocoa mass in an item that's just a novelty anyways. Serve with a nacre & even some self-anointed chocolate mafia / gurus will be impressed.