Milk Chocolate

by Theo
Info Details
Country USA   
Type Dark-Milk   (45%)
Strain Hybrid   
Source Panama   (Amistad Biosphere Reserve; Cocabo)
Flavor Earthen   
Style Mainstream      
The Jane Goodall Bar from Theo because in the world of species & habitat preservation not all is so good.

On the face of it, what chocolate has to do with Homo sapien’s closest evolutionary cousins – the chimpanzee’s of Gombe Nat’l Park Tanzania - might seem a stretch. If they’re like cats & dogs, the theobromine compound in this will kill them. The relevance is we’re both mammals & the milk in this makes all the difference.

Theo would do well however to source the cacáo where Goodall does her research – in Africa (its bars from Ghana and Ivory Coast would at least locate the chocolate’s origins on the same continent as the primates’ biome rainforest home), as well as drop the insistent declarations of “organic” & “Fairtrade”. Both often spurious claims seeing how organic certification is gamed by many & so-called Fairtrade sometimes nets farmers less than they bargained for. Not to mention sun-plantations that practice clear-cutting & mono-culture farming (a real drain on the environment). Add in the problems of the dairy plus sugar industries & this bar amounts to globalism writ small.

Still, Jane Goodall herself stands virtually unassailable – until cynics raise some trivial scandal (‘She did what? Ate a chimp burger by accident? Once wore a shirt with an ivory button on it? OMG!’). Jesus, she’s a good mzungu, as some Africans call white people; the Mother Teresa of the life-sciences (perhaps even replete with doubts regarding basic tenets of the faith included).

That proceeds from this bar benefit her institute lends veracity to its motto: ‘good for all’.... & hopefully all for good.

Thanks much, Jane, for all your life’s work.
Appearance   4.6 / 5
Color: ruby brown
Surface: troubled complexion - scuffed & marred w/ a dimple here, a Cindy Crawford mold there - but a natural beauty
Temper: soft sheen (even gleaming for a Milk)
Snap: literal; sharp upper register pitch almost to the point of brittle &, sure enough, the edgewall shows early onset bloom
Aroma   7.9 / 10
heavy & sapid: buttermilk (going for the ghost of Hershey’s lipase enzyme) –> strong baseline cocoa –> monster VOG (vanilla smog / Vanilla Oak Giant) -> dairy polymers + a red fruit team up for bubble yum bottom
Mouthfeel   13.1 / 15
Texture: powder rounds off softly
Melt: rolls effortless
Flavor   45 / 50
bumps in supreme cocoa-cream -> umami moment (salt–like event) brings the savory... generates molasses-toffee more than caramel -> as in the beginning, so in the end... nothing but pure chocolate cream
Quality   17.8 / 20
Simple but rich... & deep... it could require its own sumptuary law; a milk gorilla really.

Dairy proteins synthesize into umami-stimulating components (partially due to free glutamate) creating that salt hit to subsume cacáo’s bitter polyphenols, masking them with toffee-like deception.

Overall, a fantastically well-focused flavor profile & quiet melt-progression make this ideal for ADHT kidz, especially during those uncertain & disturbing periods in life that sync up to what Isak Dinesen, author of Out of Africa, believes: “God made the world round so we’d never see too far down the road”.

This just might instill the power of concentration as forceful as Isaac Newton who wrote in his memoirs that he was immersed in science as a child at play along the seashore with the great ocean of truth awaiting discovery.

Try it... Mikey will not only like it, he’ll also keep quiet.

Reviewed Autumn 2009


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