Plain Dark

by Oakland
Info Details
Country USA   
Type Semi-Dark   (70%)
Strain Hybrid   
Source Jamaica   (St. Mary's Parish; Islington)
Flavor Crossover   
Style Old School      
Easy, mon as in ‘easy-does-it’ allows this to live up to its name of Plain (& deceptively simple... as in extra-ordinary). Almost sidereal: a Chocolate-champagne, the latter popularly associated with the Benedictine monk Dom Pierre Perignon (1638-1715). Although he neither invented nor discovered it, he founded many principles & processes in its production that are still in use today. Upon sipping the bubbly he reportedly declared, “I am drinking stars.”

This bar amounts to champagne for less than the price of beer.

Appearance   3.9 / 5
real home-made look
Color: on the light side of brown
Surface: thick brush strokes
Temper: oily
Snap: sharp & low
Aroma   7 / 10
strange mix of creosote & champagne with the coal-tar & ash-wood dominant
Mouthfeel   11.8 / 15
Texture: powderful & dry
Melt: mass & fat separate into liquid with globs
Flavor   45.6 / 50
spices in on Jamaican allspice + a flash surprise champagne-grape -> lychee-like guinep settles thru to cocoa cream -> rubber bounces off cocoa butter -> with figs the fruits really start coming on strong (sapote, canned peach, ackee + yam) -> Milk Chocolate ending... loiters around golden raisin
Quality   16.4 / 20
‘Home-ground’ / kitchen-ware from scratch. Probably cooked in a convection oven & finished in a jerry-rigged mixer (hell, maybe even a Cuisinart™). Expect no golden roasts or sub-20 microns on the Mouthfeel.

Which all points to this bar’s redeeming feature.

Jamaica can be a fragile cacáo. Industrial or even vintage equipment could’ve laid this to waste.

Oakland Chocolate Company calls it about right & brings justice to the origin. If it goes even a little hard, giving this the rough treatment, the bar would’ve sacrificed the few delicate compounds it possesses &, in the process, threaten its charming humility.

ING: cocoa mass, sugar, cocoa butter

Reviewed July 2011


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