Theodent Kids

by Rennou
Info Details
Country USA   
Type Semi-Dark   (toothpaste)
Strain Amazon   
Source Ivory Coast   (?)
Flavor Naked   
Style New School      

You know you have it. We all do. No, not that… but Valentine’s Day – that special date when humanity, engaged in a conspiracy of love, feels compelled to give heart-shaped boxes to prove our affection. Break-up from Godiva or the “raw” bar loaded up with pathogens, & that clinical-Cassanova geeking on about cacáo’s “love compounds” found in “sultry chocolate” like the “bliss chemical” anandamide (a cannabinoid neurotransmitter released in the brain while feeling great) -- none, btw, in high enough concentrations to be aphrodisiacs by their lonesome. (Pssst, the secret to chocolate’s FXs is in their symbiosis.)

This VD tell that special someone "you're more than a little bit all right" & put your love in a tube… of chocolate toothpaste.

Theodent® harnesses the power of cacáo -- specifically the active ingredient theobromine (an alkaloid belonging to the methylxanthine class) -- to build healthy teeth. Reduced here to its pure isolate, it protects teeth against decay, hardens enamel better than fluoride, & encourages maximum re-mineralization. Thank Dr. Arman Sadeghpour at Tulane University in New Orleans for this sweetest scientific discovery.

Not only does his Theodent® promote oral hygiene, it makes the act of brushing better than a dozen roses. After a li’l dab, it'll be all lip-locked, the gateway to... well, Theodent's® completely non-toxic which means you're free to swallow.

the C-spot®
Appearance   4.8 / 5

You've Come a Long Way, Boy: designer toothpaste has arrived... wrapped fit for NM or Saks
Color: egg shell with a touch of pink pearl (from mythical Criollo seeds?)
Surface: slick
Temper: glycerin
Snap: n/a
Aroma   8.2 / 10
chocolate cake frosting / icing... roasted cocoa note (probable Côte d'Ivoire)
'chemineral' back (the acitve ingredients hydrogen / calcium coming thru)
Mouthfeel   12 / 15
Texture: lotion... excellent spread across the pal (for palate)
Melt: instant on contact & thin
Flavor   42.8 / 50
mainlines chocolate with good vanilla draw, strong & long... gradually dilutes ever so slowly... making room for metallic traces (probably titanium &/or stevia) -> slight cooling sensation (sorbitol + citric acid) -> dusted cocoa tickles the throat -> clear film finish
Quality   17.1 / 20

Building on the launch of the mint-tinged Theodent Classic, Rennou releases this chocolate-chip flavored toothpaste.

Technically for kids, but why should they have all the fun stuff, especially if effective for adults? Teenagers, 30-somethings, & elders can be Theodent Kids too. In fact the instructions advise as much.

Realistic; decent chocolate flavor; better than many a so-called "fine chocolate" bar & priced accordingly (~$12).

Best of all, data indicates it actually works.

INGREDIENTS: Rennou (proprietary theobromine, calcium acetate, & sodium hydrogen phosphate), water, hydrated silica, sorbitol, xylitol, glycerin, xanthan gum, citric acid, sodium benzoate, titanium dioxide, stevia extract, sodium bicarbonate, sugar-free chocolate, vanilla extract

Reviewed February 13, 2013


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